Goody Howard, MSW, MPH, a nationally acclaimed sex educator, came to Holy Cross on February 12th for an event titled “The Birds and the Bees...and STDs.” It was sponsored by the Office of Title IX & Equal Opportunity, as well as Health Services, Student Wellness, Relationship Peer Educators (RPE), Student Health Awareness Peer Educators (SHAPE), and the Student Government Association (SGA), and was advertised across campus as a “sexual health education trivia” event with a “live Q&A.” The event was held in the Prior Performing Arts Center and gathered a crowd of nearly fifty students.
On her website, Howard describes herself as “your favorite sex educator's favorite sex educator”[1], dedicated to “empowering through sexual exploration, education, and awareness”[2]. She also advertises “Goody Gear”[3], her merchandise, including items like graphic hoodies and shirts that read “Masturbation: i’m rubbin’ it”[4], “DILDO DEALER” [5], and “got toys?” [6] Additionally, her website has a wide selection of sex toys listed under a section called the “Adult Toy Store” [7]. She also advertises various workshops such as “Rideology,” a sexual fitness class, “Lick!” and “Lip Service!”, which are “penis-focused” and “vulva-focused oral sex workshops,” and “Play Date!”, a “pleasure event” about sex toys [8]. At Holy Cross, she hosted “Sex Trivia!”, an event aimed at testing participants’ “sexpertise” and whose booking fee starts at one-thousand dollars [9].
She began the event with a slideshow describing her biography, featured speaking topics, and a list of organizations which she has been featured on. Among these organizations is Pornhub, the most visited pornographic website in the world, Sister Song, an organization credited with creating the term “reproductive justice” and dedicated to increasing access to abortion, especially for women of color, and XBIZ, a sex industry news source. Presumably having been informed about what she is and is not allowed to promote at a Catholic institution like Holy Cross, she expressed brief concern and promised to be “on her best behavior.” What then followed was a quiz-game about the human reproductive systems, STIs, and contraception with prizes for the top three scorers.
The trivia questions included, “Which condom brand is most likely to break?”, “What are the side effects of hormonal birth control?”, “How long can sperm survive outside of a human body?”, “How many kinds of orgasms are there?”, “Should heterosexual couples use condoms for anal sex?”, “Are semen and sperm the same thing?”, “Can you get pregnant while on your period?”, and “Can lesbians get STIs?” After each question, she gave her own answers and answered questions from the audience. She explained to students several aspects of the reproductive systems and sexual intercourse, such as the difference between the vulva and the vagina, how the menstrual cycle affects the immune system, and how sperm function in relation to semen. She also noted that “squirt” is a term which refers to fluid that is expelled from the Skene’s gland rather than urine, and explained how to perform manual-vaginal sex when one has long nails by using gloves and cotton balls. She also touched on several points about contraception, such as the fact that Plan-B becomes less effective as one’s body weight increases, that lamb-skin condoms only prevent pregnancy and do not prevent STI transmission, how to use the website for the “ONE Condoms” brand, which offers condoms in custom sizes, and that heterosexual couples (in “perfect practice”) should use condoms even for oral and anal sex.
After the quiz, the remainder of the time was dedicated to responding to anonymous questions from the students. During this final segment, she responded to a question about how to properly clean a “rose” sex toy, a question that she expressed great excitement about answering at the beginning of the event. She also responded to a question asking whether or not “gay sex was real sex.” She responded with an unequivocal “yes,” since (to paraphrase) “they do the same thing straight couples do: penises are exchanged, there are mouths on genitals, etc.” Another student asked whether or not “scissoring,” a sexual practice involving two vulvas, was actually a real thing and whether or not “it worked.” She again responded with an unequivocal “yes” on both fronts. Before elaborating on her answer, she again expressed slight concern about whether or not she was crossing the line, but after receiving the “OK” from one of the staff members facilitating the event, she proceeded. First, she shouted to the audience, “Alright folks, phones down!” in order to prevent anyone from recording what she was about to do, and then proceeded to enthusiastically and confidently demonstrate how to perform the act: she dropped to the ground and pretended to grind her genitals on those of an imaginary woman to simulate the aforementioned act of scissoring. This was followed by a roar of cheering and laughter from the student audience.
She also explained how to clean one’s mouth both before and after oral sex to ensure the health of oneself and one’s partner, as well as the locations of both the male and female “G-spots” and how to correctly stimulate them with one’s fingers in order to excite arousal. Finally, before taking a video for her social media page to advertise how educational her workshops are, she ended the event by answering the question, “Can I still experience sexual arousal if I’m practicing abstinence?” Again, her answer was yes, which she explained by stating that just like virginity and sexual orientation, abstinence is a spectrum. Thus, one could engage in “self-pleasure,” i.e. masturbation, in order to enjoy sexual pleasure while abstinent. Or, if someone chooses not to engage in masturbation, she recommended regularly going to the gym “in order to let out all that pent up energy” which must surely be there among people who do not masturbate.
At the end of the night, the room erupted in applause. The staff members and the students present all appeared to agree that the night was a great success, and the mission of the event had been accomplished.
Endnotes
[1] Goody Howard, “Home,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com.
[2] Goody Howard, “About,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com/about-5.
[3] Goody Howard, “More/ Goody Gear,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com/goody-gear.
[4] Goody Howard, “More/ Goody Gear/ McMasturbate Hoodie,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com/product-page/mc-masturbate-hoodie.
[5] Goody Howard, “More/ Goody Gear/ Dildo Dealer TShirt,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com/product-page/dildo-dealer-tshirt.
[6] Goody Howard, “More/ Goody Gear/ Got Toys? Hoodie,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com/product-page/got-toys-hoodie.
[7] Goody Howard, “Adult Toy Store,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com/adult-toystore.
[8] Goody Howard, “Scheduling & Workshops,” Ask Goody, https://www.askgoody.com/workshops.
[9] Ibid.